Thursday, November 13, 2014

about today.

Life throws us through the ringer sometimes, that's for dang sure. Between feeling like I never see my husband, financial things, and just feeling unfulfilled in life, the last few months have been pretty terrible. The thing, and it's a sad thing, is that ever since a strong bout of depression four years ago, bad days just seem to be the standard. Sometimes people give me a hard time for getting excited over little things, but if I don't get excited about stupid, little things, all the bad things take over and it sucks. I feel like the hard stuff builds and builds until I break and literally can't do it anymore.

Which brings me to the past few weeks. Like I said, the last few months have been hard. Brandon has been stressed with work, I have been stressed with life (as usual) and we hadn't taken a lot of time to just do us and really communicate. Last week we decided to eat dinner at the kitchen table, rather than in front of the tv. Growing up family dinner was always so important to my mom, and I didn't think it would really make a big deal with just the two of us at home, but after doing that for a few days Brandon and I both commented on how nice it was just to be able to sit and talk. Of course we always talk about our days, but for some reason it was just different sitting and talking for a while.

Friday last week we went on a date night that included dinner and a movie. We love dinner dates because a. food and b. good conversation. Then we went to Big Hero 6 and laughed like the little kids we are. Saturday Brandon only had to work for four hours, so afterward we drove 20 minutes to our favorite Costa (again, food). That night we were planning on going to a tailgate party at our apartment complex for the BSU game. We made some snacks , got all geared up, but when we got to the clubhouse, the only people there were old people. Don't get me wrong, I love old people, but we were planning on going to the party so we could make friends, and this wasn't really our crowd of people. So rather than stopping for the party, we continued through the clubhouse out to the car and went to my parents' house instead.

I've said it before but I'll say it again, I love how strong my relationship with my family has gotten since we moved back here. Watching the BSU game (and a terrible movie, sorry mom) with my parents was so fun. We just sit and chat and have a genuinely good time. Not to mention we are all super evil at heart and have made hiding the cardboard-cutout Sheldon to scare people a new hobby. I'm obsessed with my family.

On Sunday, Brandon and I set out on a mission to take our own Christmas card picture. And let me tell you, it looks amazing. If you are one of the lucky people who receives one, you'll see what I mean Monday we had an in-service day at school. I love the kids at this school, but it's always nice to have a little time to bond with the rest of the staff. I still feel like the new kid sometimes, so I like getting to know people more. Brandon and I both had Tuesday off, and took the opportunity to celebrate our 4 years of officially being together. We slept in until 9:30, had crepes for breakfast, then didn't leave the apartment until like 3:30 when we went to go get Costa (yes, twice in four days). It felt amazing to not do anything all day!

Onto today, the real reason for this post. I woke up in the best mood today. Like I said, I get excited about little things, but this morning I was happy for no real reason at all. It was supposed to snow later today, but when I left for work it was already lightly snowing, and I didn't even hate it. I spent my time at work today listening to Christmas music, drinking hot cocoa, and painting snowflakes on the windows into the library. It has been a super freaking good day, and I am so happy and grateful for today.

So this was a long-winded post just to say how awesome today has been, but basically today I realized that while life can suck a lot of the time, somehow the good times always pull through for me. I thought of this while I was doing random things around the library, and it's super corny, but I'll post it anyway: the man can get me down, but at least I have my man to get me back up.